Grandma Gaines Tribute

I have wanted to sit down and write this tribute to Grandma Coleata Gaines for some time, but all of the ideas that I came up with seemed to somehow end up being more about me. I finally arrived at the conclusion that the influence that someone has upon you, and the different ways that they have affected you during your life, is very much a part of who that person is for you.

My first memory of Grandma Gaines, and as far as I can recollect my first memory altogether, was a family trip that we took to Nebraska after we had returned from England. I can still remember waking up in the car alone. My cheek had been pressed into the plastic covering of the car seats, and I had a funny feeling on my face where I had fallen asleep. I had remembered my parents saying that we were going to visit my grandparents, but I had no memory of them because it had been awhile since our last visit. I must have been about 4. I can remember how I peeked from the front window of the car into the house. It was growing dark outside and there were voices and lights coming from inside. It was one of those glorious feelings that you get after a good nap sometimes, knowing that you have some exciting things to do later on. It was also a curious emotion, knowing that you are about to meet your grandparents, but you can't quite remember them.

I know that at some point I woke up enough to get out of the car, walk up the short driveway and open the front door to the house. The house inside was brightly lit up, and my mom and dad were seated around the dinner table with my Grandma and Grandad. My arrival at the dining room was greeted with "look who woke up!". This is years before the time that I might have answered back to my parents "look who left me sleeping on my own in the car! LOL ;)

I remember getting seated and watching a plate and eating utensils magically appear before me. The next thing that I recall was Grandma looking at me, and telling me that she had heard that I loved corn. She proceeded to pick up my plate and gave me a large serving of corn with butter. Now I don't know where she had secured this advance information on my eating habits, but I was completely satisfied at her choice of a food offering to me, and I realized at that moment that I had a friend on the inside, and one who was looking out for my best interests.

I always recall receiving her many letters and cards at every holiday season. Her hand writing was always so clear and even from a young age I can remember being able to read it easily. It always seemed that the person on the other end of those letters understood me, and I realize that she obviously had a great understanding of school kids. Her job as a grade school teacher was something that I could relate to at a young age, and we often talked about her classes and students.

I would like to try and let my family know what a real wonderland Grandma and Grandad's house by the lake was for me. I can remember the trouble that my cousin Jeff and I caused there after breaking the zipper on Grandad's precious personal sauna because we were attempting to play hide and seek inside of it. I can remember rowing my sister Sarah around on a boat in the lake, and I can remember thinking how lucky my Grandad and Grandma were to have such a wonderful home.

Grandma I miss you. You will always be in my heart, and never far from my thoughts. I loved you on this earth and at this time, I cannot but keep on loving you.

It is hard not being able to be with my family at this time. I know that most of you were gathered together at this special time and it was hard not to be able to take part. It is important for me to let you know, that as one of Grandma's Honorary Pallbearers, she is missed by me very much. I have prayed for her for many years, prayed for her during her time of sickness, and now after her death, pray for her soul to find a comfortable resting place in the next world.

I miss all of you so much, and I wanted you to know that many of your names cross my lips in prayer each night as well.

My warmest regards to everyone. I wanted to sit and write each and every name but I thought that if I forgot one, or confused someone, it would be inappropriate.

Conveying my condolences from the Holy Land of Israel,

Mathyu

From Cathy (Gaines) Mattoon

Aunt Coleata, to me, was always such a gentle soul. I remember visiting for a few days in Grand Island when I was small, elementary school age. She made me feel so comfortable and secure being there without my parents. She sang in the choir at the Methodist church and I remember going with her and sitting in the choir loft, probably during a rehearsal. It may have had more of an impact on me than I realized because now I am the choir director at our church! I also remember during that or a similar visit that she somehow got Gretchen to take me to the pool with her and to the county fair with all her high school friends. I'm sure Gretchen did not want me tagging along, but Aunt Coleata knew that it would be fun for me and a special memory, too, so she didn't take no for an answer.
When Aunt Coleata and Uncle Steve lived in Doniphan we occasionally used their home as a meeting place. Traveling from Sidney with a friend (originally from Aurora) and our toddlers, we would meet my parents at their home and then travel on to Linoma. Aunt Coleata would always play with Kendra and, of course, feed us. I never did get her chicken casserole recipe which I loved!
My most recent memory of her was at our daughter, Kendra's, wedding. It was so special to me to have her there. She was the only relative of ours from that generation to be present. Aunt Coleata was selected to participate in a game the DJ used to pick  the next table to go through the buffet line. I have a picture of her raising her white-gloved hand to try and guess the song. Mind you, this was only 3 1/2 years ago. What a trouper!
She was a wonderful person and a very special Aunt. You are all so lucky to have had her in your life.
Cathy (Gaines) Mattoon

From Frank Gaines

Remembering Aunt Coleata and Uncle Steve

I remember as a young boy how thrilled I was whenever I got to go to Grand Island to visit. For there, I had cousins of my age and gender and that was not to be found anywhere else within driving distance. And in Grand Island there was always great food and loving adults.

I remember being absolutely heart broken when we got to the state basketball tournament to watch a great Grand Island basketball team only to be turned away because the fire marshal had locked the doors. I cried and cried all of the way home.

I remember going to Peru State in the fall as a youngster to watch great football in the Oak Bowl and realizing the significance of the Gaines, Sams, Crink family to Peru State. And I dreamed of playing football for Peru in that wonderful atmosphere. And later, getting to play in the Oak Bowl just once and then not for Peru but for Wesleyan. And Peru whipped us badly :-)

I remember my Grand Island cousins and my Michigan cousins working at Linoma and the great times we had. And wonderful family get togethers on the island at Linoma. Little did I then realize how wonderful those times were.

I remember going to lots of great track meets and listening to Uncle Steve and other coaches analyzing the meets. Always figuring out how to beat Scottsbluff and Coach Binfield.

I remember how thrilled Aunt Coleata was when Gary won the Gold. The whole extended family was ecstatic but Aunt Coleata was overjoyed.

I remember realizing as a young man how my Mom and Aunt Coleata really truly enjoyed sports. They had no choice but their interest could not be faked even though acting runs in the family.

I remember realizing that Uncle Steve's interest in sports and officiating paralleled my loves. Then later realizing that Uncle Steve's interest in hunting and fishing paralleled my brother Mike's loves. And it dawned on me that Uncle Steve and Aunt Coleata adapted their interests to fit the occasion and the need.

I remember that after Uncle Steve died Aunt Coleata asked if there was something of his that I would like to have. And I was honored when she gave me an old Peruvian Annual from his era which I deeply cherish.

I remember how great a time Aunt Coleata had at Kendra's wedding. In her 90s and still enjoying life to the fullest.

And I remember, when I visited Aunt Coleata last, her great pride in her children and grandchildren and great grandchildren. She regaled me with photos and stories. And I left knowing that though her body was wearing out, her mind and spirit were forever intact.

She will be missed.

Scent

Susie, I remember playing that game with your cheeks when I was little. It's fun to think that you got that from playing with Grandma. I also remember Grandma giving the best back rubs. One of my early memories at Grandma's in Doniphan was sitting at the little nook just inside the kitchen at Thanksgiving time. I was eating ....or rather being told to finish...what was left on my plate. It was a corn casserole and I didn't like it. I decided to do the old wrap it up in your napkin like you've eaten it trick when Grandma came in and saw what I was doing. I thought oh man I'm busted....but Grandma let it slide and just commented to me something like.."Didn't care for that much huh?" I didn't get in trouble and I thought whoa...Grandma is alright. It's silly but I remember it fondly. I also remember sharing her bed a time or two when we would visit, and the smell or her is still with me. Scent is such a powerful trigger for memories and I find myself checking things we have moved out of her apartment for that familiar scent.

Thinking out loud

I suppose it hasn't sunk in yet. For me Grandma is still present in Lincoln. Maybe because, for a while now, even when we visited we didn't get to see a lot of her so it kind of feels like she is still there.

Like Jenny, I have very fond memories of Grandma's touch. She was the only one who could brush my hair out without hurting my head. I loved that. My earliest memory is from the house in Hastings, sitting in the wingback chair cutting logos out of LOOK magazine and, alternately, making pot holders in a little loom she gave me. I also remember playing that game with her where you blow your cheeks up with air and then squeeze them between your hands so that your lips make raspberry sounds when the air blows out. I thought of that game when I kissed her goodbye on the cheek for the last time.

My memories of Grandma are pretty self-centered though. Dad recently wrote me an email with an incidental sort of remark about her that shocked me and cracked me up at the same time. I went and looked it up. Here it is: "And Susie I wished you could have heard your Gma Gaines yelling her head off at various athletic events...she was really obnoxious and used to embarrass my brother Gary...." And I thought ours was the first generation to behave that way. Anyway, it got me thinking. I wished I had known more about Grandma as a person and not just as "Grandma". As a kid, life was all about !me! and Grandma was always (well mostly always) happy to play along. Maybe that's just the way it is supposed to be, or, maybe that's how Grandma wanted it. Still, I look forward to seeing her through other's eyes. I regret not doing it sooner.

Memories of Grandma

It took a long time to reach Grandma each summer, driving from Wisconsin to Nebraska, an eternity to a child, but I could count on one thing upon our arrival-while the grown-ups talked grown-up talk, I would receive endless neck tickles sitting on the floor in front of Grandma. I will miss your loving touch Grandma.

This is how Grandma looked whenever we talked

about grandkids and great grandkids. She loved

hearing about, and telling others about, all of you and never forgot names.

We Lincolnites had the privilege of sharing in news of the whole extended family. She praised your efforts and accomplishments and no accomplishment was too small for her to notice.

I often heard her say, "I have so many good memories".

From Jeff

She always voted for you In thought she wished you well We loved you deeply Grandma Beyond what these words tell Our time on earth is now bereaved Of Grandma's loyal presence She lived her faith in love and prayer To her Savior for our best Farewell then to our Grandma, Farewell - but not goodbye Our time together soon will be His Family Gathering in the Sky
	Jeffrey Stephen Gaines (San Diego, CA)

Just some examples

of what you can do.

1. Write (obviously)
2. Photos or pictures
3. Videos



I didn't have a video of Grandma immediately available but I thought Husker stadium wouldn't be inappropriate.

Hello

If you have made it this far congratulations. I think this format (free blog) will work best and be the easiest for people to participate in as a memorial for Grandma Gaines. If anyone has any questions about how to make it work, OR if you have a better idea, email me!

Susie
smeagle@everestkc.net